The night before surgery 5/11/13

 

The following was an email sent on 5/11/13 the night before I had my original surgery...

 

Hey Friends!

I've felt like I've had no news to share about my cancer for some time, but finally I do have some information.

Tomorrow at 12:30 I'll check in at UW for surgery with Dr. Byrd, one of the top guys in the NW for this particular procedure. I'm having a sentinal lymph node biopsy in addition to the removal of the tumor. There is an infusion of radioactive isotopes into my neck before surgery and they'll use a geiger counter to find out where they travel to identify which lymph nodes to remove. Then the actual surgery will be from 3:00-4:30 and I should be home somewhere from 6:00 to 7:00.

The pathology report on the sample won't be back until the following Monday when I'll find out if I'm stage III or not. The docs I've spoken to have confirmed that I'm stage II and it appears that I'm II (B), but no one wants to say for sure until after the surgery and the resulting pathology report.

Likely, after the surgery I will have skin check ups every 90 days, but other than that no additional treatment. Based on what I've read about Melanoma and what the various docs I've spoken to have said, there really isn't much that they can do to treat it. Chemo, radiation, interferon, simply haven't been effective at all and there is nothing right now that looks to promising. Melanoma is an extremely personal cancer and you just hope that your particular version is one of the lessor dangerous varieties. It seems that luck has a huge role in survival rates, along with catching it early and getting it removed.

I've certainly felt a huge beneficiary of love, support, and prayer from many friends and even a number of strangers as well. Moving into our new home was stressful but we had the help of 30-40 people to shoulder the load which made me conclude that if anyone ever wants help moving, the best thing to do is announce that you have cancer... it works I promise. :)

There have been a lot of thoughts going through my mind. I don't really feel like dwelling on the negative but neither do I want to be stubbornly optimistic without acknowledging the downsides either-neither polarity seems appropriate. I guess I feel opmitistic and also realistic. I don't feel worried for myself, I feel at peace with whatever lies ahead for myself...it is my kids and Jamie that is the larger concern as my premature departure would have much larger impacts on them. I would like to write more on my thoughts and feelings down at some point but won't tonight... The other night in a prayer/reiki session with the mother of a friend of ours, the title "The Gift of Cancer" came to me. More on that later.

I believe that grace will be experienced from whatever transpires...and hoping that the surgery is successful tomorrow.

Thanks for your support and Happy Mother's day to all you mothers out there!